When God urges us to do something, it is so easy to tell Him all the reasons why what He put on your heart is not a good idea.
“God, I’m not talented enough.”
“God, I’m just an average person, who faces trials no different than anyone else; what influence do I, little ‘ol me, have in a world so big, and a market so saturated?”
“God, I’m not qualified enough, and I’m surely not a preacher.”
For months, I dismissed His prompting to start this blog, because the thought of it brought paralyzing fear upon me. Like, “no way, Jose” type of fear. After all, who cares about me and my personal story?
But, as I continue my journey with God at the helm, I find Him revealing countless things to me. One of which is that my fear demonstrates a lack of faith in Him. In the book “Dangerous Prayers”, the author states it so simply:
Your greatest fear may point you to your best chance at making a difference in the world…To please God, to serve Him, to honor Him, to live for Him, you cannot be driven by fear. You must be led by faith. I’ve often said, the pathway to your greatest potential is often through your greatest fear. Faith will propel you forward. In fact, what God wants for you may be on the other side of what you fear the most…As God reveals your fears, he will also build your faith…Faith doesn’t mean you don’t get afraid. Faith means you don’t let fear stop you.
Craig Groeschel
So, to honor God more than my fear, here it goes. I hereby introduce you to Prayer, Faith, and Love.
My name is Corey and I’m a Christian mother of two, but not a very polished one. It’s not for a lack of effort, I just never grew up with religion as part of my life. At 35, I’m still not yet to a point of being able to eloquently quote scriptures that align to the moment of spiritual warfare someone is in, beautifully sing all the common hymns from memory, or effortlessly recite the Creeds without fumbling on a word or two.
But!
Each day I get better. Stronger. More knowledgeable.
Right now, my life is reminiscent of someone who went out for a routine stroll in the mountains with the expectation and promise to return home, only to make a wrong turn and lose all bearings of how to get back. Perhaps the somewhat appealing thing about that scenario, though, is the likelihood that search teams and expensive technology can locate and bring you back home to the life you knew and enjoyed.
As for the realities of my actual life? Well, my search team is made up of beautiful spiritual mentors who pray with me, pray for me, and help instill the promise of God’s Word in each conversation we have. My “technology” is the bible, which costs hardly any money and is more reliable and proven than anything else available, and aside from the people God placed on my path, it is the only compass I have that will get me back to a life rich with love, laughter, and deep family roots.
So, even though I am in the trenches of spiritual warfare without any indication of when I will win, I’m trusting there is value in having you join me as I wait for the Lord to move my mountain.